03 December 2008

Do You See What I See?

Since I can import all my posts now from another blog, you may find my archives filling up quickly. Go me!

Do you ever find yourself laughing at your own writing. I've got to be one of the most narcissistic peeps on the planet. Man, I crack myself up.

Speaking of cracking myself up, I'm compiling my yearly list of Christmas music to avoid. I may or may not have made these up.

*Christmas Shoes Are Pinching My Feet

*Peaches and Herb's Christmas Reunion

*Wall Street Shafted Me Christmas

*Homeless Roasting Near An Open Fire

*Black Friday Shoppers Will Activate Your Dental Insurance

*Doozie Goes To Court At Christmas: Pelize Stabalot

*I've Got Mr Coffee To Keep Me Warm

*Kabbalah's Rudolph, The Red Bracelet Reindeer

*Dance of The Shovel Whacking Fairy

*All I Want For Christmas Is A Green Borat Speedo

*Beano Presents: Silent Night

*Snoop Dog's Pimpin' In Santa's Sleigh

*Amy Winehouse, The Woman With The Bag

*Mos Def's Fat Booty Santa

*I'm Dreaming of An Employed Christmas

*Here Comes Santa Claus In His Hybrid Electric Car

*Al Gore Raps The Christmas Story

*I'll Have A Beer Christmas Without You

*Jerry Springer Christmas: My Family Tree Don't Fork

*Ding! Fries Are Done Soundtrack (only click on this if you want this song stuck in your head)

*Fireman Choir Sings: Put Out That Yule Log, I'm Coming Down!

*Walmart Exclusive: I Got My Front Tooth For Christmas

*Man, Santa's Hot! with the smash hit single: Oh, Holy Cow..It's Mr. Coffee

*Starbucks Hear Music: Santa's Making More Coffee Cup Ornaments

*Elves Reunion Special: I'll Have a Chinese Lead Poisoned Christmas

*Myspace Christmas: I Saw Mommy Kissing Everyone

*Politically Correct Christmas Vol 1 & 2:
The 12 Days Of A Holiday Season with bonus track~
Away In An Animal Enclosure Turned Hospital Birthing Suite

~Bee sticks to the classics


Rebecca Blevins said...

I don't know...I might just want to hear a few of those. You know, to see how they sound.

I so appreciate you putting up the link for the baby care tips. It's been several years since I had one, and I needed to brush up for this one.

I think I'll need a crib. Dang it. All this time I was planning to use a dresser drawer!

Jen - Queen of Poo said...

I clicked on it because I thought it had to be better than the song that was previously stuck in my head.

I was wrong. :-P

This is the wholesome song I've been singing all morning long in my head

Bee said...

Anything to help. I wonder if they are going to make a baby slobber guard for those grocery shopping trips where people 'forget' or will a crib mattress work in a cart?

Q.P. can be for Qtie Pie, yes?
Wow, almost as fun as Tom's Diner. hahaha.

... Paige said...

OMG that was a killer, I laughed so hard my pits are dripping.

Where's the baking soda when ya need it?

Music music music that is all I ever here

Bee said...

hurrah for baking soda pits! Maybe we can make an extra album for you, "I'm Dreaming Of A Finished Remodel"

R said...

If I were you, I would crack myself up too.

Hey, that rhymed! Cool!

Doozie said...

I'm pretty sure the shovel whacking fairy was written in my honor..am I right? am I right?

Skerrib said...

I, too, am my biggest fan. I think I'm hilarious.

I cannot stress the importance of the hint on how to check a diaper. Very good advice.

Dapoppins said...

ooooh. It is lookin fine and Christmas-ie over here...I think I need to hear that one song...by the fireman choir...do they have a video? Is it the same guys from the calendar...?

Whistle Britches said...


McBunni said...

Bee, I frickin' love you.

Jeff and Charli Lee said...

Excellent list Bee... I particularly liked "Pelize Stabalot."

sarahgrace said...

Hee hee heee, my fave is "Beano Presents: Silent Night" ! Freakin' hilarious!

Foo said...

A guy I used to work with had that Burger King song as his ringtone. I was never so glad to see someone quit and move on.

Another one that will get stuck in your head, but in a good way, is Aaron Tippin's "Mama's Gettin' Ready For Christmas". And since I'm now an iPod owner, I just downloaded "Wizards In Winter". Now if I could just get an MP3 of that rendition of "The Nutcracker Suite" played on bicycle parts, I'd be all set.

Saur♥Kraut said...

I was on the phone talking to a business colleague when I saw the pic of waking baby with an airhorn and I started to laugh, which I quickly had to turn into this great big wracking cough. The businessman asked me if I was starting to get sick....

Anonymous said...

Can we add "Christmas In The Northwest"? The first time it was fine. Even the first time each year. But then, enuf already!

holly said...

i hate myspace. but i love a little bit o' mommy kissing everyone. that song NEVER gets old!

Jo Beaufoix said...

Mr B and I just laughed our bottoms off at the baby tips. Hilarious. Thanks mate.

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"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words."

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe