Today I went to Tire Mega Warehouse. No, my tire shop is not Tire Mega Warehouse, but if I tell you what the name is, you would attempt to call each and every location to hunt me down, I just know it. You'd find out that I was the woman who brought in the 1996 Ford Windstar that smelled like old coffee and needed the original struts and Uncle Buck shocks replaced.
If you do not know what Uncle Buck shocks are, feast your eyeballs on this youtube beauty. It's one of my favorite laugh out loud 80's movies.
After only an hour and forty-five minutes, they extracted the offending nail from the back tire. I can't imagine what took so long. The only other guy that was 'ahead' of me in line was irritated that it was taking so long and was pacing like mad. He must have argued with the front desk three times. The squeaky wheel doesn't always get the grease. Apparently, it waits forever in the tire store bay.
I contemplated many things while I sat and waited.
•I was put on this planet to help other people build character.
•I wonder why people think a lift kit on a mini van is remotely a good thing.
•The virtual wheels computer program makes me laugh when I put giant spinners and 22's on my virtual van.
•Why does the popcorn taste so good in the tire store?
•I'm glad I brought my own coffee.
•If you act rude to customer service, they don't work faster and may perhaps, use your vehicle for training purposes.
•Which reminds me, if you had your head up your nether regions, there are benefits. 1)You would never have cold ears, 2)wouldn't worry about bad hair days, 3)could yell at anyone and never upset a soul and lastly, the bright side? You could perform your own colonoscopies for free.
•If you unwedged properly, you wouldn't have to worry about regularity any more, your head would stink and yes, you would look like Gollum for a few days.
•I've got to stop four-wheeling over construction sites in my van.
•My four year old loves the fact I carry around a lot of change.
•We both like vending machine Jelly Bellys.
•I have to buy struts, shocks, and tires AND get an alignment after I sell my organs on craigslist.
•I am glad I walked this morning.
•I can't wait for more entries to my 3rd Annual Mullet Photo Contest!
•When was the last time I blogged?
Now you know.
