Dear Gas Station Store Manager,
As a frequent visitor to your store, I feel it is my duty to report an issue I have with your establishment.
I am happy to report that your store is tidy, clean, and appreciate the employees consistently greeting me and my kids with a smile. I've found your employees unusually friendly for the customer service industry, and efficient with the tasks at hand.
However, I do have a small issue with your candy area that I'd like to address. Have it be know that I also have issue with your Gorilla Burgers that are good enough to make angels sing in glorious unison and are the sole reason I am not losing weight as fast as I'd prefer, but I digress...
It's wonderful to have the candy and gum around the corner from the cash registers, but does it have to be here?
Sincerely,
Bee, Marketing Professional
Yes, folks. That's Skoal chewing tobacco in direct eyeball view below the Big League chewing gum. Gum chew to tobacco chew? Watch. By next week, they'll be giving out fake oxycodone's and x-small prison uniforms to the first 50 kids buying Slurpees.
~Bee is a good clean feeling, no matter what.
10 comments:
That's terrible. I liked Big League Chew when I was younger, but now I think it's a bad idea.
I'm certain there was no coincidence in that. I hope you really did complain!
Blimey, can kids buy that?
They'll be putting 'how to hotwire a car' tool kits there next, along with 'bourbon for beginners' or something. Weird.
That's awful! Here the chewing tobacco is behind the counter and needs to be asked for!
As far as Big League chew? Best damn bubbles you'll ever blow!
Yeah, that would bother me too- then again, you could use it as a good opportunity to teach your blogs about the dangers of chewing tobacco AND marketing!
Disturbing!
I"m totally into candy cigarettes. I go all about town trying to find them. Me and Walter sit by the hours pretending to smoke. Here is my motto: I don't advocate for children to start smoking, but for those children who already do smoke, "boy it's good isn't it"?
The message was brought to you by Parents Against Humor...or PAH/brynelle, something like that??
do they still *sell* candy cigarettes? i'm in the market for an addiction...
Haha, great letter. :)
...just noticed that Let GO is on your playlist down there...EXCELLENT song. It's one of those that I can put on repeat for hours at a time and it never gets old.
Like the Skoal people didn't come up with that.
Post a Comment
"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words."
~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe