No, no, nooo! You don't get to leave yet. You will enjoy this particular trip through the grocery story because there is no long division, coupons, or shrieking children. You may also forego telling the checker to "help yourself" as you slap your wallet on the counter.
On a side note, Mr Coffee and I think there is a market for a wallet that makes a toilet flushing sound every time you open it. Last week, I could have used the Airport Industrial Flush when I purchased school supplies. It's also like that when I go grocery shopping so I attempt to cheer myself up while I shop. Sometimes, the trip itself cheers me up.
For instance, a young woman above who I managed to capture with my cell phone a few months back. She is wearing her boxers to the store. In all their glorious butterflied yellowness, I noticed the tell-tale butt stitching with the button fly in the front. I hope the day never comes when I've lost the will to get fully dressed for the day. Does she feel no shame?
Then we have the usual kids' shenanigans.
Nothing says, "I'm bored!" like a nice pair of bug glasses.
I saw a picture on a friend's facebook and saw the same item in my store. It made me laugh, so I had to share it with you. Nothing could trump One Whole Chicken In A Can until now. I'd think that Cracker Meal goes best with Honkey Toast.
Once you've had Cracker Meal, you can move up to Cracker Trax. Forget the abusive pimp or costly dealer, you can buy these in a bag now. And the upside is you can keep your reputation, your health, your relationships, your sanity...the possibilities are endless.
I could have SWORN on first glance these ice cream bars said, "DOUBLE CHIN" across the box.
Nothing makes a trip complete without a trip to the wine isle. The wine isle is always a happy place for me. Aside from the obvious, my Uncle actually worked for Korbel most his life. Hearing my Uncle speak made me feel like I still had my Grandpa. I miss them both and Korbel makes me remember all the good things about them.
ARG! Matey! And really is there anyone who gets enough Pirate Booty? hee heee, I said Booty. Fire on the POOP DECK!
I told you it would be painless grocery shopping.
~Bee wonders who else grocery shops at night when kids are in bed?