22 April 2007

Interview With a Badoozie

1. Your false teeth have just fallen out in the toilet. You can't afford new ones, and you can't live without them. What would you do? Oh, I forgot to mention, its not YOUR toilet, its a porta potty full to the brim with human excrement.
I would buy a blender.

2. If you could have any brand of wheels known to man, which ones would you chose for your windstar van?
Omega Wheels. Then I could sell the wheels and pay off my van. Then I could donate my van for a Van Smash for Charity. 5 bucks for two whacks with a baseball bat.

3. IF you had to attend a self help seminar, what would it be about and why?
Understanding Schizophrenia and Mental Health issues. My mother.

4. What was your all time favorite pair of jeans?
A pair I purchased at the GAP, size 6..long. I was 19 and when I left the incredibly crowded dressing room to look into the mirror, the entire dressing room area, including sales people went silent. I felt lots of eyes on me, I was so embarrassed. The very gay GAP employee said snapping his fingers, "WOW! HONEY, if you don't buy those you are craaazy!" Really. I took his advice. Those were fabulous jeans.

5. How many guys have told you that you were a good kisser?

Badoozer, I should kick your butt for asking this. Mr. Coffee is the only one that counts and that I remember. So the rest...I plead the 5th.

**And no, I am not chicken. Every guy I kissed never once had complaints. I can count it on one hand. Hey, I'm no one to kiss and tell.

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