06 January 2008

Out With The Funk, In With Cookies

I'm a people pleaser and I don't like people to think ill of me. This goes deep in my childhood psychosis from being ripped from my mother's Partridge family printed dress (in yellows and purples no less) and bouncing around in foster homes, being yelled at a lot. Sure, crap happens but I've always been a little insecure because I find a need for people to like me. Thus my last post, but my readers rock my socks. Good advice to be had and doggonit, people like me.

I'm going to shake things up in 2008 and that is the method I blog. Justify less in 2008. Spill it, no edits, more of what's in my head, and less explaining, unless of course, it's what's in my head. I think I've been trying too hard and that's made blogging a chore. It takes forever to do a good post. No more blogger chores and therefore no need to scale back. Just fun and me being introspective, over-analyzing, self-depreciating, and generally retarded. Go me!!

Today was a weird day, half the day spent between kids, commenting, and chores. I find a bit of solace in the everyday chores, nothing changing in routine can be theraputic knowing what is required of me.

I like organized. I thrive on structure. My OCD side is fed a big fat piece of chocolate psychological cake by doing chores, monotonous as they can become. And pass the Cool Whip.

I went to the library today and checked out my finally-three-weeks-on-hold, The G0lden C0mpass. I already don't like the author but I felt I should take another stab at it. I had to cross myself when I checked it out just in case the authors cooties got on me.

Huzzah for attempting to be open-minded. Remember Thomas Dewar said, “Minds are like parachutes; they work best when open."

Really? Open minds also let in infection, or your brain leaks out. Also note that parachutes opening prematurely also get tangled up and you hurl to the ground with a 120 mph irreversible face plant. Thomas Dewar was a handsome and quotable man but boy howdy, he needed to lay off the homemade whiskey.

For the record, the library at our mall smelled terribly. Why don't these dudes religiously waiting in line at the library for free internet feel as passionate about a shower. Even a weekly shower would be an improvement. With soap. Lots and lots of soap. I went so far to ask the librarian if it usually smelled like B.O. most weekends and her reply was lots of head shaking and agreeing,

"There are a lot of (whispers) teens (/whisper) that come here to use the internet and sometimes the air gets that teenage funk...I'll tell my boss. I've been telling them about the filter in the air purifier..." she trailed off.

Teenage funk = butt crack and sour milk.

As in NOT fresh.

Maybe they should pack kitty litter in boxes under the desks. Holy. Cow.

I managed to make it home without passing out from the lingering stink embedded in my olfactory nerves. Mail came today and Mr. Coffee was sent a letter from Future Employer which asked him to jump through further hoops for his job application/interview. He seems like he has been kicked in the teeth, not that it isn't do-able, just a major hurdle. I don't like seeing him down. It makes me want to fix it and in this, I can't.

I'm going to finish my book Hunting Unicorns by Bella Pollen this week. Then to start on the book from the library about a wonderful adventure on how a child manages to kill God. (I almost hear the lightning hit the author)

Speaking of cooking, I'm also going to make cookies. Doesn't oatmeal cookies sound fabulous..mmmm, with cappuccino chips.

Last of the good news, we have neighbors now across the way. My four year old daughter says Madison People are moving in. I was thinking, "What the heck are Madison People?" The only Madison I knew was her My Scene doll. Then it dawns on me.

My darling daughter has both of these dolls. The one on the right is Delancey. The one on the left is Madison. We live in a very white town, so I'm glad even my youngest is learning good things like diversity.

~Bee's mouth is like a cookie parachute


Anonymous said...

I love the Madison People thing, so cute. I grew up in Las Vegas, and while its not as diverse as say New York or Chicago, it has a pretty decent mixture of cultures and race. When I was about 7 I told my mom I wanted Doctor Barbie for Christmas. My mom did get me one, but that particular barbie looked like Madison. I didn't notice or care a bit, and later on she asked me if I minded that the Barbie was black (she was just worried I didn't like it, not that she bought wrong or anything like that), and in my silly over-exasperated 7 year old voice I said to her "Mooooom, there ARE black doctors!" like HELLO? Where have you been living. *laughs*

Now that I'm living in a 90% white, Christian community I will have to make sure my children know that there are lots of different ways to look, live and all that fun stuff. :D

Anonymous said...

roses are red
butt cracks are blue
your neck dimple has
a gray hair too

Anonymous said...

you forgot to give accolades to your boy for the sour milk and butt crack comment

Anonymous said...

Ah yes, library funk. I wonder if the teen internet funk is similar or different from the genealogy room funk I used to experience, back before Ancestry.com came along and spared me the whole going-blind-in-front-of-the-microfilm-reader thing. The smell of butt crack and long-unwashed scalp from some of these folks was overwhelming.

Anonymous said...

oh i so have not done my homework, and my brain will *not* store details very well. i have a vague recollection about you talking about the golden compass thing before; it's about killing god?! but that was before hubby gave me the book for christmas. what a great gift, as i have never ever mentioned it, never shown any interest in it, and only know about 1501 books that i would easily have rather had. it'll be awhile before i get to it (shocking) so i'll wait for your review before i do so. still, it beats the hell out of his other gift, a book about zombies. what?!?!

btw i support the not-trying-to-please. i come here cuz you's you. :)

Anonymous said...

Library funk is a tragedy. All those old, delicious-smelling books, with the nut jobs stinking up the place... I don't think it would be out of the realm of PC-ness to post discreet "Have you showered lately?" signs next to the computer monitors.

Good point on the open minds thing. I've had similar thoughts myself. Let us know how the Atheist's book turns out.

Anonymous said...

No justifying in 2008. Good on you! I'm also a people pleaser, but I've learned that some people manufacture things to be offended about and it's not my job to make the world happy. Let the world find its own happiness, and I'll add to it by finding my bliss. It's all I can do. Of course, there is the complicated matter of finding bliss in making others feel better too. Ah hell. No matter what it's a balancing act, and I haven't figured any of it out.

Teenage funk? I am all too familiar with that. Thankfully my library has good ventilation, but when you live with them it's hard to avoid the funk. :-P

Anonymous said...

I am a people pleaser too! Congrats on your decision not to worry about what other people think! That Madison people thing was cute - out of the mouth of babes!

Anonymous said...

Love the Madison people story...too cute! :-)

Anonymous said...

thank you for the 'asian dating contacts'.....i'm meeting ashiki on thursday for coffee.

Anonymous said...

question answered.

Anonymous said...

I read all three of those books not knowing what I was getting into. I will admit that I liked the first book enough to check out the next one. The second one had me shaking my head a little and plowing through because I was invested in the characters by then. The third one...I hated. That is just me though. Its not to say the author doesn't have talent. I am interested to know what you think of the books.

Anonymous said...

Who is Thomas Drewer? Is this someone I should know?

Anonymous said...

Really I would like the transcripts of what goes on in your head sometimes! Freakin' Brilliant.

Oh but don't think I like you at all ok....I want updates on the "Folden Chump Ass" book. Oh please excuse my spell checker seems to not be working.

Anonymous said...

Your daughter is brilliant for recognizing Wisonsians, Wisconsintonians, Wisconites.

Anonymous said...

You'll have to read all three books to get to the God killing part.

Happy New Year, Emma.

Anonymous said...

"library at our mall smelled terribly"

You have a libaray in your mall?!?!?

Anonymous said...

Happy New Year Bee and who knew you were a poet lol??!!

Anonymous said...

Dear Bee,

I embrace diversity but not ta da extent o' not usin' common sense. You’d bettah make sure ya lock yo' doors at night an' don’t jet anyfin' outside.

It will be pimp-tight fo' da homies ta gots some real competition when it comes ta playing football an' hoops.

I suggest ya not attend any crack parties just ta be neighborly. That sheeit iz addictive.

I hope ya all iz havin' uh Happy New Year.

What 'chew thinking man?

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