16 September 2013

Gastronomically Rended, And How Are You?


Okay, this means nothing but I got your attention...

A lot better than telling you tired and busy reasons for being tired and busy like every other tired and busy person on the tired and busy planet also doing tired and busy things. Plus, chocolate cake...YUM, right?

How often do we say, "I've been so busy."?

Is this a valid excuse anymore? Who isn't busy? Do we throw that out there because we really are tired and busy or because we are too lazy to make conversation? I suspect it's that we don't want to get to chatty with our neighbor dudes because then we can't pound on their door and tell them to quit parking like a beached whale or letting their dog pee in the stairwell. Hypothetically speaking, of course.

How different would our meet and greets go during the day if we answered something other than, "busy" or "tired". I think we should mix it up a bit. Answering an inquiring grocery checker or your neighbor with something new could really make good conversation. "Paradoxical", "Nefarious", or "Dichotomous" work for those wordy, nerdy types. "Gastronomically rended" or "Engorgingly happy" also works, especially on strangers.

Try it and get back to me. Try not to get slapped.

Aside from my alleged bowel pyrotechnics, I had a birthday last week. I had a lovely laid back day with a side of pedi/mani. For someone like me, a frugal soul who shoe shops under spousal threats or goes for a hair trim three times a year, I felt pretty pampered. I got a book (Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell) and Mr. Coffee took me to dinner. I asked for a bouncy castle and a cotton candy machine maker like last year. Then I remembered the bushes on that side of the yard are still reeling from the effects of untimely disgorgement and still sprouting funky colors. And it's not just the evergreens.

To add to my busy-ness, I start Fall semester in about a week. I'm still not full-time and that's why I've been in school since the Industrial Age. I hope to be finished and fully employed in a year and a half. I'm certainly not complaining. I love school and being at home with my kids but also having a plan with an end. End is good. End means a new beginning. And then on with a new plan before my kids graduate from college along side me.

I hope to write again this week despite my nefarious, dichotomous, paradoxical busy-ness. I may even bring chocolate cake. For reals.

-Bee likes her girly nails
Listening to: Where Is The Love by The Black Eyed Peas

07 January 2013

Stinkin' Sweet

Today is the first day of the new quarter. I'm excited, of course, but there is always a nagging voice in the back of my head that speaks evil things in my ear while the Evil Inner Me eats donuts.  Donuts are just to throw me off because in my head, Evil Me looks like I did when I was 21, natch, and reverts to acting like a cow sometimes. Insult to injury and all that...

While polishing off a fifth donut, Evil Me declares loudly that I will have to work too hard and will probably qualify for AARP before I graduate.  In contrast, Saintly Me, wants to put Evil Me in her place. Saintly Me wants to give Evil Me a black eye and waive a diploma in her donut stuffing face. It's a rousing fight in my head that would make even Chuck Palahniuk proud.

Saintly Me and Evil Me go rounds every first day back to school. Saintly Me always wins.

Today, I decided I would attempt a go at writing every day. I don't know why I'm announcing this. I probably wont blog again until next year.

In this winter break, I read a lot of books. One of which had only one redeeming merit that has inspired me to ease into my daily blogging with one yucky blucky thing and one good thing for the day we can be thankful for. It's a good way to acknowledge that yes, stink happens but we can end it on a sweet note. It's called Stink and Sweet.

Stink and Sweet Monday Edition:

Technically, the day isn't over but I'll be arranging my erasers by color and labeling my PeeChees tonight so I may not have the time.

STINK: Getting to the bottom of my laundry pile and finding a long lost couch blanket and the Thanksgiving tablecloth. Let's do the math.....GROSS...

I do laundry every day and have managed to put off the last remnants of my laundry until I can have a full load. If this makes me cheap, whatever. Who on God's green, tree-hugging, earth runs half a load of wash? I think everyone has something at the bottom of the laundry hamper, be it lego, a silk shirt that you are too cheap to dry clean, or some errant sock or glove. Besides, my mom taught me not to waste energy by running a half load. Peace, love, and recycle....and put off Thanksgiving linens for a whole month.

Didn't think my Stink would be so literal, did you?

SWEET: The thrill of sleeping in AND then going to school to learn about computers makes me stupid happy.

School advisory advised me to take a computer class to avoid taking another year of math. The funny part is this is an entry level computer class to keep from a math class.  I don't see how that computes but I won't complain.

-Bee thinks this is stinkin sweet.
Listening to: It's Time by Imagine Dragons