07 May 2007

Love Letters From Collections

There isn't a month that goes by that I have to handle a situation of collections, or billing calling me for one reason or another. I have a common name, which makes this even more fun. Protecting credit is a difficult task regardless of erroneous billing. When I receive a love letter from someone demanding payment, I quickly attempt to resolve it.

With this said, I dedicate this post to Kaylan at:

Penn Credit Corporation
PO Box 988
Harrisburg, PA. 17108-0988
(800) 900-1380

Now, Kaylan appeared helpful from the beginning. He quickly became combative and very frustrated, interrupting me often. I reminded him that this is considered rude and if he would be so kind to rephrase his accusatory tone to a more gentile and civil one.

I seriously thought he would be the first collection agent to hang up on his own collection attempt with him being so frail and delicate in spirit. I might think that he may soon suffer from adverse medical conditions solely from the stress of his job. If I were in his shoes, I would seriously seek employment at a flower shop or pillow stuffing warehouse. Perhaps coal mining would be a good option, well away from the general public.

I informed him my PO BOX was a new address. Further, I never received these books, nor have I been billed for this alleged 2 year old purchase until now. I would like the creditor's address, number and or fax and remove myself from his very busy schedule. I could not confirm where these items were shipped, so we were going nowhere fast.

Now, I ask all of my readers with an IQ over 50. Is that such a difficult task? Kaylan claimed, "we have no way of contacting them, they just send the information to us through the computer".

He couldn't provide any information about his client. The one his company is representing.

I'm no dim bulb here. Well, of course he could at least provide the address of the company that is attempting to ruin my credit, as is required of them by law.

The underpaid, overworked young man became even more combative and quickly informed me that I did purchase said books, and further that I would continue receiving calls from them until it was resolved.

After a call to Canada, and a short google search resulting in another two phone calls, I contacted a certain gentleman employed by the creditor in question.

Let's call this man Dave. Cause that was really his name. I think I love Dave. Kaylan could take some tips from Dave. Dave is now my new hero and if I miraculously conceived despite my tubal ligation, I would name all future children Dave.

My 30 minutes of lost time afforded me a quick phone call back to Kaylan who incidentally declined to take my call as relayed by another employee. Do men get PMS?

I so wanted to rub my zero balance in his face, of course, barring rudeness and shouting phrases like "YOU ARE SO MODED!!"

That would not be appropriate. All in a days work.

No comments:

Post a Comment

"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture, and if it were possible, to speak a few reasonable words."

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe